Saturday, October 18, 2014


Kentucky Coach John Calipari
Kicking off the season previews series with the #1 team in all the land, the University of Kentucky Wildcats. Coming within reach of a championship last year, John Calipari's Wildcats look to claw their way back to the top!

Also introducing the Scout's Corner, a section not recommended for the faint of heart. This is the advanced sports metrics section. Don't even bother if you can't deal with doing mental math.

I didn't make this blog so that idiots could come in here and drool on themselves, leaving comments about how they don't understand THIS and THAT. I'll tell you this: CFH is a fool-free zone. 

If you're even THINKING about leaving one of your useless, brain-dead comments on this site (and you KNOW who I'm talking to, you), I'll have your IP banned and put spyware in your browser's cookies so that you'll REALLY be in a world of hurt.

I am a computer hacker and I know how Javascript works. Don't believe me? It functions by finding a target HTML element, and then doing something to it, just like CSS, but the way it operates, the syntax etc. is rather different. JavaScript is a more complicated and expansive subject than HTML and CSS, so to keep things simple and avoid confusing your simple minds at this stage, I won’t be discussing it in the below example.

In fact, you won’t be looking at JavaScript information on this site again unless you go spewing your mindless garbage on my comments again.

Just keep that in mind next time you want to run your mouth around here.

SCOUT'S CORNER: The 3 Main Bulletpoints
  • Nearly unanimous preseason number one picks
  • Two separate FIVE MAN UNITS holy shit
  • John Calipari has acquired a BUTTLOAD of new NBA-caliber recruits, likely one-season-and-done. One-and-dones from recent years include Anthony Davis, Nerlens Noel, Julius Randle...the list of top tier picks goes on and on 
Add one more name to that legendary list:  COTTON NASH. This young up-and-comer graced the cover of Sports Illustrated this week and is sure to shred. Yes he'll eat his way through the SEC's gluten-y defenses like a celiac glutton (meaning it'll make him sick but he's tough as a rock so w/e).

Basketball's newest white superstar

Thursday, October 16, 2014

All is quiet on the western front...

 Born anew, in the eye of my life's hurricane, so gently in a basketball. So quiet and calm....

One must wonder: Will college hoops even happen this year?

The deafening silence. The calm before the weather storm (and the unbelievable gale force twisters that are to follow!!!). A cyclone of this magnitude can't be good, take shelter. Lock your windows and your doors, board up your hoops cabin shack. Protect that big screen TV!

Spill beer on the cable broadcasting console, o networks. Save us from the breathtaking drama of another college hoops season. My heart can't take it!

I still care I must admit

I know that if we ever break up
I know you'll never make up
And I'm sorry, so sorry

But my heart can't take it no more

Half the times you lied
You know how many times I cried
Lonely tears, it brought me misery

Maybe one day you'll realize
Just how I really tried
Darling to make you happy

I gave my heart
You only took it and destroyed it
And now you say it's me you love

Yet you cheated and deceived me
And now you say you want to keep me
And I'm sorry, so sorry

 In the mere cyclone of a month, the basketballs will dribble down from the skies, there ain't no stopping me now. College Freakin Hoops, 2015, let's do this.