Friday, October 28, 2011

2012 UCONN Preview

Reigning NCAA Champion UCONN Huskies are a projected top 5 team in the early polls. NOT SO, I say, somewhat illogically. Let me explain.

Jeremy Lamb and Alex Oriakhi lead an After-Kemba (A.K) era, and the complete UCONN staff of athletics employees of 47 have been affectionately nicknamed "The AK-47". This unfortunate nickname will stir up the anti-violence groups and cost us some money.

This team will be very talented, but will lose a bunch of close games. Young guard Shabazz Napier will inexplicably become the Mount Saint Helens of college hoops, ready to erupt with projectile vomit at any given moment.

Coach Jim Calhoun once again hopes to have them playing in the flay, but they have eaten too much flan to stay competitive (according to unofficial CFH statistics). This tiresome food will lead the team down a road filled with negative energy and gassy fits of diarrhea, inevitably. Sorry again for the dark forecast.  It is what it is.

No comments: